My First Threesome | Making Life A Love Affair
Once upon a time,
I got in bed with two guys and this is the full story.
You might be thinking… I thought she was a business coach… why are we talking about threesomes?
I’ve built my brand off of the stories that I tell… the ones that matter most to me. If you want to learn how you can do that too, read about Turning Darkness Into Divinity or another one of my more slutty pieces Enlightenment, BDSM, & Your Biz.
If you’re along for this ride, I’m going to teach you in this piece how to get what you really want!
I was 22. It was New Years Eve. The dance floor of our warehouse party was packed and the music was incredible. Some of my guy friends from college found us dancing in the crowd. I noticed this new guy in the group who I thought was so sexy.
We started talking.
A little bit of flirting turned into wild dancing.
All of a sudden, the show was over and we were standing, googley-eyed in the almost empty space. “Where are you going right now?” He said with a sly smile. “Idk, where are you going?”
He whisked me off into a cab to an unknown location.
We arrived at the condo of the after party, walked through the doors…. I saw him.
My college crush right there and my heart stopped. It’d been a whole year and I still got butterflies looking at him. We said, “Hi,” with a lot of flirty energy, before I snuck out to the rooftop to get sexy with “new guy”.
Long story short, I spent most of the night trying to not be super distracted by my old college crush and still doing my best to pay attention to the new guy that I had just met hours before.
It was basically impossible, because they were close friends.
As the evening wound down, all of us, new hottie man, college crush and little ole me, laid down on a bed. We were all joking, laughing, snuggling. I was literally in heaven spooned between the two of them. My college crush started whispering sweet nothings in my ear. I rolled over to give him some attention. In my head, I’m like, “Is this actually happening?!" fantasizing about the threesome that could be going down. Just a few seconds later, I heard a loud slam.
I looked behind me. What was that?
My new crush was gone.
The sound was a door slamming shut. I had officially destroyed this new connection and I was bummed. I made it a point to drop in with him about it. We talked; he was super distant. “See you around,” he said. He lived in CA; I in CO. It wasn’t gonna happen.
About 6 months later, I was still thinking about the guy who ran out on our almost threesome, all the time.
He was funny and hottttt, so I messaged him on FB(so classy) apologized profusely AGAIN and ask if I could come visit him. He said yes. So I hopped on a plane.
Here's why I'm telling you this story...
For literally a whole month, I sat at my boring ass corporate job and fantasized about seeing him again. I pictured his apartment(that I'd never been too), thought about kissing him(which I barely remember), and envisioned my time together with him. I thought, “We'll definitely go on magical picnics on the beach and have breakfast at sunrise while doing yoga on the roof”.
I HAD A MILLION EXPECTATIONS.
You know where this is going.
I arrived.
On the car ride to his house, he told me he was dating my friend.
There was no floor to ceiling glass pent house. He lived in a bachelor pad, SoCal garden level apartment, where I had to turn the hot water on in the shower with vice grips.
We barely hung out while I was there. It rained every day. I went on runs on the beach in the rain ALONE.
I got way too drunk one night, tried to have another threesome with him and his new fling.
Instead, I burst into tears.
It was awful then and hilarious now.
how this affects Your Fantasies
For weeks, I pined about this guy. We would reconcile and maybe fall in love and it would be so exciting and maybe I could finally have a reason to be in California more often and maybe... maybe.
Well maybes aren’t guarantees.
Perhaps you have a similar line of thought, “One day, when I make a lot of money, I’ll find a partner.” “One day, when I have enough savings, I can quit this boring job.”
Here’s the real shit part of dreams…
1. Someday, that dream may come true… but I doubt you’ll be happy with it(I’ll explain more below).
2. Someday, your one dream, may not come true.
If you don’t follow/practice/understand the steps below,
you will ALWAYS be disappointed and you wont’ get to the sexy stuff.
So here are the steps to your deepest desires,
that I wish someone had told me…
Have More Than One Dream
When our “dreams” disappoint us, the typical solution is to stop dreaming. A lot of my clients get shut down when their dreams do not work out. They say, “It didn’t work the way that I planned. They say it’s too hard. Maybe, this isn’t meant for me.” Halting your dreams feels just as ick as the disappointment that follows.
The real solution is this: Have more than one dream.
Here’s how that works. Write out your desire and create options.
Desire: Spend more time in nature.
Dream v1: Nature immersions with clients.
Dream v2: A long weekend backpacking
Dream v3: A walk at the end of the day
I could go on and on with this prompt, because I’ve flexed this muscle so many times for myself and for clients. If you only have one dream, you need to develop this muscle. Use the above as a writing practice to do so. As your strength in possibility grows, you will create more dreams internally, which creates more opportunities experience them externally.
Have Dreams You Can Control
Whenever I involved some outside force in my dreams that I cannot control, those are moments when I have to check myself. Whenever you need clients or a certain environment to fulfill your dreams, I would recommend doing this too. You cannot control anything except your attitude. Read that again. Now that you have all of the possibilities, you’re on a track to fulfilling those desires, but practice using this tactic. Envision the opposite of what you want to happen and be okay with that too.
Here’s an example:
Maybe I go on above backpacking trip and it rains the entire time. Maybe it won’t. Regardless, I’ll learn what I’m made of.
Maybe I will sell out this group program. Maybe I won’t. Either way, I’ll be glad I tried because it’s my purest vision for my business.
Maybe I will meet the man of my dreams. Maybe I won’t. Either way, I’ll continue to be the most vibrant person I can be for me, because that feels amazing.
Surrender Your Fantasies To The Universe
So once you’ve gotten good and comfy with allllll of the possible outcomes. You’ll learn that it’s way more fun to let go. No matter what happens, it’s for your benefit. That it’s part of your lesson and that all of the expectations limit you from feeling into the possibilities. When you open the space of possibility, you open to all the options. You give the Universe access to your heart's desire and prepare to be wow-ed.
Spicing things up is destroying your dream life.
The real morale of this story is this. When I got into this situation with hottie Cali man, I was just bored, bored with my job, bored with my love life. I was making all of these little surface level sprinkles to spice things up.
Here’s what that looks like:
I hate my job that I go to everyday for 8 hours - Let me take a 72 hour vacation.
I’m lacking confidence in my body - I’ll buy a new outfit that only makes me feel better when I wear it.
I really want to show up for myself - I’m going to do meditate for 5 days straight and then forget about it for the rest of the month.
If you want to make fundamental, foundational changes in your life, if you want to experience more yumminess, goodness, and sexiness in your life... Here’s the next step.
Don’t do it “one day”, your desires need meeting.
The root of your problem is that you’re waiting. “One day, I’ll have a threesome and I’ll experience a sexiness in my life.” “One day, I get the best job in my industry.” "One day, I’ll meet the man of my dreams and feel like I’m worth it.” “One day, I'll figure out how to make money as an entrepreneur and I can stop working so hard.” Here’s the deal - I got the job. I met the guy. I made all the money.
I was still a self-conscious, love-obsessed, workaholic… until I truly started treating my desires as the most sacred parts of my soul and they needed to be met now.
Letting go of expectations & start living
Once you start living, outcomes feel so boring, because you start focusing on what turns you on. You’ll judge your success and your happiness by how you feel, instead of what you do. You can judge your profitability based on the lives you’ve connected with, instead of the amount of sales. The magic of this is that it actually WORKS and that you can also make tons of $$$ doing this.
Last year, I doubled my business by restructuring my biz to do just exactly what I wanted to do.
This year, I sold my first online program, simply by using social media and talking about what I wanted to talk about. I had over 5k hits to my blog already this year. Celebrated over 4k amazing conversations online and 70k connections thru likes; I am set-up for my biggest year in business yet.
No More 1 Night Stands, my love.
The whole point is what you want is possible now. If you want to have more joy, pleasure, and bliss in your life,
Don’t treat life like a one night stand.
Full of novel experience that you have once before they disappear.
Fill your life to the brim with experiences that turn you on. Just so we’re clear, my threesome fantasy is now a cornerstone of my life. If you want to have an epic threesome, you just follow the steps above. This essence, this sexiness has become my life - one that I co-create with people that I love and care for deeply.
Gorgeous human, your desires are perfect and divine.
They make your life magical and you should have them as often as you like! Don’t forget that.
If you want more of what you love, this is your invite.
If you want to be more tapped in, fill your life with love, and learn how to be in your authentic essence to get what you desire, I invite you to The Embodied Business Mentorship.
A 3 month sacred container to crystalize your story in a way that makes sense, embrace your darkness to find a true sexiness in your storytelling, reinvision what is possible in your business around your dreams and fantasies.
I teach you:
How To Crystalize & Clarify the story of your life
The Foundations of Spiritual Business
The Codex of Content and Copywriting - so that you can become your own muse
How To Re-envision your work and become more adaptable/agile in your biz
Turn Your Content Into A Social Strategy | That is easy to implement and adds value
So if you want to stop feeling like you’re in holding pattern with your dreams and you’re ready to show up as all of you online and in your biz, this is the place to do it.
Here’s to a life of fulfillment and endless possibility!
Let’s make your dreams real, NOW.
